My dear first born how are you 13 already? I can still go back to the day you were born. The day you made me a mom. The day you made us a family. How incredibly happy I was and nervous. This was all new to me…plus I was worried you would have a cone head forever. Thankfully that did not happen…whew!

 

I can go back to the sleepless nights rocking you in my arms. Laughing as you butt scooted across the floor. Watching you welcome your little sister with open arms and a big smile. You only saw her as your new baby sister not a baby with Down syndrome. You have no idea how that gave me some reassurance that things would be okay. Watching your kindness and love towards all animals. Taking on the big big sister role when JD was born. How you make sure your cousins always feel included. How you are an encouraging teammate and friend. Watching you work hard to achieve your goals whether it’s for gymnastics or at school. You have made me so proud these past 13 years.

 

Along with all the joy, I have worries too. I have worried if I have done things right? Am I making life lasting mistakes? Am I going to be that nagging voice in your head or the encouraging one? I am going to be the reason you will see a therapist? Will we have a close relationship? Will you feel comfortable reaching out to me? Will you include me in your life? I know we have had disagreements. I know we will have more especially as we navigate these teen years. So be patient with me and I will do my best to be patient with you. I will try my best to remember that you are trying to figure things out. You need to remember that I am your mom and only want the best for you.

 

As you head into your teen years, I know it can be tough. It was tough for me but with today’s society and technology it is even harder for you. But I want you to know that no matter what, all I want for you is to be happy. Good grades and winning are bonuses but being happy is truly most important. You are enough! Don’t let anyone tell you differently. Always stay true to yourself. There is only one you. Never feel like you need to be someone else. Never change your beliefs, your personality or your attitude because others want you to. Your true friends will always be there for you. They will always have your back. You may have disagreements…everyone does. Always make sure that you work it out. Talk to each other. Don’t assume anything. Sometimes you may need to apologize. Other times you may need to forgive. My middle school friends and I are still best friends. I mean they were friends with me when I had my bad afro…that says a lot! Don’t be afraid to try new things…just not bad things. Don’t be afraid to fail. Our failures are how we learn. They make us stronger. No one is perfect. The struggle for perfection is just that…a struggle. Don’t put yourself through that…believe me I know what I am talking about. You will miss out on so many opportunities in life if you wait for the perfect time. Or if you let your fear win. Don’t do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable even if everyone else it doing it. Treat others with kindness, you never know what struggles they may have. Always remember that I am here for you. I will do my best to be a good listener when you need to talk. I will help you work through problems and challenges when you want me to help. I will never judge you. I will always support you and  love you.

 

So Jena on your 13th birthday, I hope you have the most fabulous day! I hope you know how much you are loved and appreciated! You will always be my first baby. The one that started everything. The one that brought me my greatest joy.

 

Love, Mom